Remember the days when nothing was off the table? Where anything felt attainable? You smiled shamelessly when you accomplished something? Are those days over?
As a little girl, I went through so many different dreams. From wanting to be a ballet dancer, to being a teacher, a Disney princess voice actor, musician, mermaid...Some of these things came to pass, some are still up in the air (HA!) And I didn't really care at the time what my parents or anyone would say about any of it because at that point in my life, all I needed was to root for myself. And I did, wholeheartedly.
Fast forward to my adult years and my mindset started looking a lot different. I still have dreams and I try to make “practical” goals to make them a reality, but going down that path isn’t so simple. As a songwriter and performer, choosing a path in the arts definitely has its share of skepticism. It amazes me how opinionated people can be when it comes to my choices as a creative and it hurts some days, especially when it comes from those you thought were on your side. It’s on those days, that fear trumps rooting for yourself, every time. Goodbye, cheerleader, Koryn. Hello, sleepless nights filled with doubt. (you know what I’m talking about)
On the flip side of that, you can get some really great people in your life that want to support you no matter what. They want to compliment you on your work, talk about it and cheer you on your journey. They don’t think, “How dare you?!” or “You are crazy!” when you decide to go in a different direction or pursue a new career goal.
How do you react when you start getting acknowledged for the work that you do? Are you happy to receive the compliment ? Or do you immediately start to deflect and start making statements that start with, "Well, thank you, but (insert excuse as to why it could have been better here)…" Do you struggle to accept praise because you know it could always be better or feel like you aren't good enough and deserving of the praise? I catch myself doing the latter too often. If I don't say it out loud, I'm thinking it quite a bit. There is so much truth behind the “We are our own worst critics” statement. Even in the day to day, my husband points out that many times, when I cook or make a meal and he tries to pay me a compliment, I immediately brush it off and point out all the things that could have been better. I'm working on that.
Having people that root for you and believe in you is so special and important. But the biggest thing that many of us forget to do, is root for ourselves. To mentally pay ourselves the compliment, to declare positive things out loud over ourselves. (Sound silly? Try it! I promise, it makes a difference) Sometimes, a loved one has more confidence in you than you have in yourself. And thank God, for them, but it shouldn’t be this way because there may also come a day where you might find yourself completely alone, trying to do your thing, with no support. Who’s rooting for you then? Finding a way to truly embrace your wins can be a life saver in those moments. It’s great to have outside support but at the end of the day, whether you're successful, or just getting started, it doesn't matter. It's important to enjoy where you're at and be at peace knowing you will always be a work in progress. Root for yourself through the highs and the lows.
I’m pursuing things that people have told me is a pipe’s dream. I want things that may seem sooo far off on the horizon (like my own mermaid lagoon hehe) but ya know what, I’m gonna keep moving forward anyway, because believing in yourself doesn't mean that you have a big ego. Going for your dreams doesn't mean that you're arrogant. Accepting a compliment whole heartedly on something that you worked so hard on, isn't vanity. So go ahead, root for yourself because in doing that, you are always acknowledging that you are worth it.
